June 11, 2013

The sort of stuff I imagine Space Jesus deals with

A very special "Fuck it, I'm busy" featuring Ready Player One, by Ernest Cline.

Backstory!
Nerd reference!
Backstory!
Nerd refer-
Backstory!
Backstory!
Ba-
THE EIGHTIES



Some of you may think this is a joke, but the above does accurately and fairly summarize the book.
But if you want more...

Wesley Crusher narrates the fictional, sensationalized autobiography set in a dystopian future that honestly sounds a lot better than the one we got. Wil Wheaton rules the earth with a sweaty fist, while humanity eats virtual McDonald's.

The hate-child of every internet service provider you've ever had the displeasure of dealing with starts murdering kids, because the kids are trying to achieve the equivalent of being struck by lightning, while nailing the devil in a blue dress on a jet ski, jumping over a shark, and pulling out to discover the condom has a winning lottery ticket in it. SPOILER: the novel is based on the eighties culture, so the kids win, because Ronald Reagan made unhappy endings illegal.

Also, the hero gets the girl, but she's chubby, so it's not a full-on Revenge of the Nerds or Animal House win.

P.S. I only "summarize" things I like. I put this off for a while because, while I had the basic idea in mind, I didn't like the book at first. And while mocking shitty things is bad, I view FiIB as a sort of recommendation from me to you.
And if the above hasn't convinced you to read the book, I can tell you that the end fight is between every mecha Japan has ever thought up, MechaGodzilla, and Voltron. The author left out the Green Ranger's bitchin' dinosaur, but I forgive him.

No comments:

Post a Comment